Wednesday, November 23, 2011

It's time to go home.

Only a week to go and I am going back to the Philippines, yepey! I can’t hold my excitement to see my five year old daughter again.I know she is well taken care of (thanks sis Janice and Honey) and I ain't a perfect mom but  it's a truth universally acknowledged that a  mother's love is irreplaceable.

Last year, I left her for almost 6 months and it broke my heart doing so. I was the only one who have the visa, I couldn't bring her with me. Apart from financial concerns, I felt I needed that time away to heal what was broken in me. My marriage just ended, it was devastating. To ease the pain, I  was looking into any means of escape from the familiar places which seemed to remind me of the happier moments of the family I once had.  Plus the fact that I have to work to support her education makes the situation harder for the two of us.
Though I know I was working for her benefits, the guilt was eating me out slowly and it wasn’t easy at all.
Then June of this year came and I had to fly back to Charlotte after 4 months of staying in the Philippines.  My Dad was scheduled for an open-heart surgery and I needed to help my mom out. I ended up staying for 5 months doing baby/house sitting to send financial help back home.  This time I realized that money isn't everyting.  I may make more money but once time is lost, it can never be regained.  The last thing I want in life is missing out on her childhood. I know she is a busy bee now as she just started Kindergarten but I am definitely sure that she misses me as much as I miss her. I am pretty sure she missed her old momma.
It's been five months now and I can’t wait to go home.
I will be there soon my little one, just a few days more to go and Mama will be cuddling with you again.

I'm a proud mama.

Love always,
Mama




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